Cool Ideas on How the World is Changing

Goodbye Nuclear Weapons, See You in Iran!

Yesterday, the United Nations Security Council, with President Obama as its chairman, voted to strengthen the restrictions on nuclear technology, making it more difficult to convert peaceful applications into weapons programs.  This, however, is still a matter of enforcement which has been a persistent problem for the United Nations in the past; its coffee and doughnut budget has been exceeded for every year of its existence.  Iran is at the heart of this matter, even though President Obama was very general in his comments during the meeting, but glared at Mahmoud Ahmadinejad because "he knows what he did." 

One Quarter of the Afghan Vote Was Cast by Pack of Wild Monkeys; Situation Dire

Well, Afghanistan, you've got a mess on your hands.  A lot of mess.  A quarter of your votes could be tainted!  That's Chicago bad.  The good/bad news is that this isn't the worst of your problems.  The top general in Afghanistan, General Stanley McChrystal, has essentially stated that the situation is dire in the remote nation. 

Talk Like a Pirate Day!

Avast!  Today is Talk Like a Pirate Day!  A day where people of all stripes can unleash their inner pirate and express their scurvy selves.  If you need any help, check out www.talklikeapirate.com for great ways to get in that pirate-y mood!  So, in observance of Talk Like a Pirate Day, let us get into character: arrrrrr!  Now, enjoy some pirate-y videos!

Imma Let You Finish Afghanistan, but Iran Had the Craziest Election of All Time

In what we can only imagine as a scene out of Michael Jackson's Bad, clashing rallies erupted in Iran.  Today, in Iran, is Quds Day which is a major day for the Iranian regime (not unlike ten cent wing day).  It is an occasion for people to show their support for the Palestinians and opposition to Israel.  This rally by the opposition is the first major one since July and there have been reports that former president Mohamad Khatami was attacked by the paramilitary group the Basij. 

No Missile Shield for You!

Today, the U.S. announced that it is scrapping the Bush era missile defense shield in Poland and the Czech Republic and replacing it with a different system to first be deployed aboard ships and potentially then in Southern Europe.  This move will likely appeal to Russia who had vehemently opposed the Bush plan and liked to do some sabre rattling about it.  There is no word on whether or not this move was accompanied by a large shipment of vodka and beets to St. Petersburg. 

Health Care Reform Protests: Send Me Your Tired, Ignorant and Stupid.

With the recent town hall events of August and the bill that came out of the Senate Finance Committee, health care reform is as contentious as ever.  People are mad and dammit, they aren't going to let ignorance get in their way!  So what are the critiques of universal health care?  People are claiming all sorts of things.  A big one is that this is socialism.  Socialism!  Just when you thought we'd defeated that back in the 80s, it rears it ugly head.  Another critique is that it will cost too much and another is that well, Obama is a fascist. 

Graveyard of Empires: Well, Crap...

In a recent speech to foreign policy experts, former U.S. national security advisor Zbigniew Brzezinski, warned that if the U.S. does not halt the Taliban insurgency, things in Afghanistan will quickly go pear shaped.  Well, shit.  While a laudable goal of installing credible institutions and making a real, functioning country, is one that is likely worth pursuing, it will be a difficult road.  For instance, it only took 300 special forces troops to bring down the Taliban in 2001.  That just goes to show that the government there had tenuous control at best and the amount of man power needed to eliminate an insurgency will be very high.

Like Scrabble? Like Beating the Crap Out of Your Unsuspecting Opponent?

Then this Scrabble strategy video is for you!  We here at Puggling came across this while spending some quality time at MentalFloss.com.  The general strategy in this video is how to play mind games and mess with your opponent and well, we here think this is a good way to win and piss off your friends.  We don't recommend this for family game night, unless you come from an ultra competitive family.  Enjoy!

Craziness. Kanye West is a Douchebag. Who Knew?

Brace yourselves everyone.  Kanye West is a douchebag.  It's shocking, but he is.  Beyonce has the greatest video of all time?  Really?  He has obviously not seen the video for Los Del Rio's mega hit, Macarena.  Or even Cotton Eyed Joe, by someone in a redneck outfit?  While Ms. Beyonce's video is a good video, (we saw no obvious flaws, the lighting was very nice) it does not even compare to Europe's The Final Countdown.  No way.  Never.

Consider This an Invitation to My Gangsta Nation...

After a long hiatus, Puggling is back!  A lot has changed in the world since we last were here.  There were some good times.  Afghanistan had it's first real election.  It also had it's first real epidemic of voter fraud too!  It's like a whole nation made up of Chicago!  During the August recess of Congress, people went apeshit over health care reform and we all learned that bacon was bad good for us.  But now we're back and ready to bring the fire!

Sarah Palin Resigns, Butchers Public Speaking...

Well, last Sunday, Sarah Palin has quit.  She gave a rambling, disjointed speech as a farewell to the people of Alaska.  She attacked the media, Hollywood, and her opponents.  The speech was so bad that Vanity Fair decided to copy edit it.  You can see the results here.  They are bad.  Very bad.  Red ink is everywhere and they even did fact checking.

Update: Iran Still Pissed About Election

Well, it looks like the rage of 1000 Suns in Iran over last month's election is still smoldering.  Top cleric Ali Akbar Hashemi Rafsanjani criticized the hard liners in the Iranian government and called for the release of those arrested in the aftermath of the election.  He also said that doubts over the election have been raised and those doubts need to be resolved in order for this issue to be settled.  Since the Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei decreed that the election was valid, raising the spectre of doubts over the election is tantamount to challenging him.

You Leave for Two Weeks and So Much Happens....

First, before Puggling went on vacation Michael Jackson died and then while we were mourning our loss, Sarah Palin up and resigns from her post as governor of Alaska.  She must have been a personal friend of MJ and is now using this time to reflect on life and loss.

We here are not interested in necessarily what Ms. Palin's motives were, however we are more interested in what this means to the 2012 Presidential race.  While according to a Gallup poll, a good many Americans still see a political future for her.  However, the ethics complaints, the spat with David Letterman (while it appeared at the time that he lost this battle, he may have won the war) and the Baby Daddy drama with Levi Johnston have taken away from her appearance as a serious political entity. 

Michael Jackson: Hell, Even Iran Has Stopped Going Apeshit for a Minute...

Well, Michael Jackson has died.  In case you didn't hear.  He has always done his best work as a zombie so it is only natural to think that he will have a huge comeback now.  The news of his death has been everywhere.  It even appeared on CNBC's Kudlow Report with notorious bad tie wearer, Larry Kudlow.

Auto-Tune the News: Maddeningly Addicting

Puggling has recently discovered Auto-Tune the News and it is hilariously addictive.  One of our writers has been listening to this all day and still has not gotten tired of it.

Scandal! S.C. Governor Mark Sanford Ups the Bar

In a departure from our ongoing Iran coverage, Puggling is taking a look at the shenanigans of the South Carolina governor, Mark Sanford.  Sanford first made national news when he tried to refuse taking money from the stimulus package.  Most recently he was absent from S.C. for five days while apparently no one knew where he was.  What happened?  He was on a booty trip to Buenos Aires, Argentina.  For five days.  Over Father's Day weekend.  A perfect example of douchebaggery.

Iran Protests: What Do You Love About Your Police State?

While admitting (and then denying) election fraud has quickly become passé, crackdowns, beatdowns, and shutdowns are the new rage in Iran.  Today protests were stopped by masses of riot police and Ayatollah Ali Khamenei has stated that Iran will not yield to the pressures of the protests.  All this got us at Puggling wondering just what are the best things about living in a police state?

Dick Cheney Signs Book Deal: Confessions of a Powerholic

With the news that Dick "Vader" Cheney has signed a book deal for his memoirs, people are clamoring for any hint at what actually went on during the Bush years.  Well, the wait is over.  We here at Puggling have gotten an advanced copy and here are some excerpts:

Iran Still Going Apeshit; Pakistan Jealous

In a not so shocking development, the Guardian Council of Iran has stated that no voting irregularities occurred before the election not during or after.  They have also stated that there was not enough evidence of voter fraud to overturn the election results and Ahmadinejad will be re-sworn into office sometime between July 26th and August 19th.  All the while, leaders of the opposition and people with ties to candidate Mir Hossein Moussavi are steadily being arrested and detained. 

Kyrgyzstan to Allow Use of Air Base

In a reversal of its previous decision, Kyrgyzstan is going to allow the use of an air base to support the NATO mission in Afghanistan.  Previously, Kyrgyzstan had given the U.S. six months to get out, but many believe that this was just a move to increase the rent that the U.S. currently pays.  Annually, the U.S. pays about $17.4M in rent and another $150M in aid.  While the rent will be increased, this is likely to be a deal of "bases for vowels." 

Iran Election: They Admitted It!?!?!

In a flash of stupidity, the Iranian Guardian Council stated that more people voted than were eligible in at least 50 regions.  However they claim that the discrepancy is not enough to affect the outcome of the election, but admitting that there were shenanigans in the election will likely not placate the protesters.  Too many votes were cast?  Apparently the voting in Iran is run by this guy →.  The Iranian regime could at least have stuck to its story.  There are middle school cheating rings with greater message discipline. 

Iranian Election: We Call Shenanigans

Just in case you haven't been paying attention, something smells funny in Iran and it's not just the thousands of people in the desert heat.  In the recent Iranian election, there was a reported 85% turnout and incumbent president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad won a surprising 62.6% of the vote.  While this might not be in itself a strange result, the fact that his victory was announced before some of the polls closed, and before many of the millions of paper ballots could possibly have been counted.

This week the Ayatollah went on national television to declare that the vote was not rigged.  Thousands of Iranians are still planning on protesting on Saturday despite the despotic decree that protesters be "held responsible" if these protests continue which sounds like code for "crackdown."  In something eerily out of the plot of V for Vendetta, Iran is blaming outside threats for the internal turmoil and is basically threatening violence on the populace if they don't stop expressing their dissent.  Hell, Iran has its own secretive shock troops called the Basij.

So, when the crowd shows up looking like this → the Iranian regime will need to run for the hills.  While the approach the protesters are taking is mirroring that of Ghandi, the power of peaceful protest is still great and it is doubtful that the Iranian country would react well to a crackdown on peaceful protesters.  The longer these protests continue, the greater the threat to the Ayatollah and the mistake of effectively giving the election to Ahmadinejad could be the turning point and potentially bring about change in the country.

Iranian Protests: Twitter Now Used for Something Other than Talking About Your Cat

The spotty reports coming out of Iran are showing what appears to be a massive protest against the recent elections.  Many of these reports are coming through on social networking sites like Twitter or Facebook.  The Iranian regime is attempting to block access to these sites with very limited success.  There have been thousands of posts on Twitter of video and photos of the protests as well as the violence that has accompanied some of these.  The normal usage of Twitter, blabbing about your stupid cat, is being overshadowed as the amount of these posts grows. 

Much of the organization of these protests is being run through Twitter and today a massive rally was organized in Iran's capital, Tehran, by the opposition leader, Mir Hussein Moussavi.  If these protests continue to gather strength, this will force the regime into a corner and the reaction will likely not be pretty.  The real power in Iran does not rest within the president or with the prime minister, but with the supreme leader, the Ayatollah.  Think of him as one of the crazy cat people on Twitter.  He's getting madder and madder that his tweets aren't being heard over the din of the protesters.  Once he is threatened enough, he is likely to use force to quell this movement. 

Once it gets to the point of force, the situation can become very destabilizing to the entire country.  This will become a power struggle and the entire country could very easily delve into a civil war.  However, if these protests slowly peter out, it is likely not much will change in Iran, and this is how the regime would like this all to end.

Zicam Causes Loss of Smell and Listening to Rush Limbaugh

Today, the Food and Drug Administration has ordered that Zicam be removed from store shelves because it can cause a loss of smell.  Rush Limbaugh hawks this stuff all the time on his radio show.  The FDA might want to investigate whether or not it causes insanity, obesity, irrationality, racism or even straight up dickishness.  This might not be an exhaustive list of symptoms caused by Zicam, so the FDA might need to be on alert for other serious mental disorders.

Iran, Tired of N. Korea Being in the News, Goes Apeshit

With the controversial results of Iran's recent presidential elections, Iran has once again recaptured the headlines.  Protests have broken out after Mahmoud Ahmadinejad claimed to have won a landslide victory.  However, this is truly a blatant attempt to steal back the headlines after North Korea appears to be setting up its next dictator by giving him his own title roughly translated as, "Cuddly Aardvark." 

One protester was overheard saying, "they think they can push us off the front page of the New York Times?"  He then proceeded to throw spoiled cabbage at riot cops.  The outrage over the recent nuclear test and rocket launches boiled over this weekend.  "We are tired of being though to have 'potential'!" screamed one mad protester as she hurled a tomato at a smoldering pit where a Lexus used to stand.  After this fruity display of rage toward the international press community, she attempted to explain her position in further detail, but was pegged with a canister filled with what some are calling chemical weapons, but what we in the U.S. call Axe Body Spray.

In an attempt to calm down the restless populace, the supreme leader, Ayatollah Ali Khomenei ordered an investigation into the election results.  There is some speculation that a quick end to the conflict will relegate Iran's political maneuverings to page A6 or even A7.

However, at the core of the issue is the fact that the election appears to many to have been rigged.  When asked for comment, expert in being defeated in rigged elections, Al Gore, was unavailable, but over the phone we could hear quiet sobbing in the background.

Zack Morris Still Has It

He appeared on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon the other night.  Everybody knows that Zack Morris is still awesome and the coolest.  Oh, and Slater was kind of a tool.  Beat Valley!

Operation Iraqi Stephen: The Colbert Report in Iraq

All this week, Stephen Colbert is broadcasting his Comedy Central show from Baghdad.  In addition to filming his show in Iraq, Colbert is also guest editing this week's edition of Newsweek.  You can check out clips and entire episodes of the Colbert Report over at ColbertNation.com.

If you want some more info on how the war in Iraq is going check out some of these links:

• Victory in Iraq by Fareed Zakaria.
• Iraq's response to President Obama's speech in Cairo.
• Iraq and Iran, man, they did not like each other....
  

Hammer Pants

For everyone out there who remembers those glorious days when a man (or woman) could wear parachute pants with confidence, this video is for you.  M.C. Hammer would be proud.  (Our favorite is the old guy in the head band.)

U.S. Mulls Intercepting N. Korea Shipping; Seeks More Kimchi

The Obama administration is considering in effect a blockade of North Korea.  In a report from the New York Times, Secretary of State Clinton indicated that this option was still on the table.  Shipping that is suspected of containing materials used in the manufacture of nuclear weapons would be confiscated.  (We here at Puggling believe this is what is referred to as "kimchi.")  The hope is that China would assist the United States in this effort, allowing the use of its ports and airfields.  However, there has been no indication so far that China would be willing to help.

This effort would likely be highly confrontational to North Korea which has already threatened retaliation if such actions are taken.  (N. Korea takes its "kimchi" seriously.)  Currently, its Taepodong-2 missile can potentially threaten South Korea and Japan and North Korea has one of the largest militaries in the world.  These threats underline how seriously North Korea wishes to become a nuclear power.


Stopping the arms trade, which is one of the most profitable enterprises in North Korea, would cripple its already ailing economy.  (The dark area on the map is North Korea.  The lone light is from Kim Jong-Il's night light.  No word on his blankie.)  Analysts suspect that North Korea pumps up to 40% of its GDP into military efforts, leaving its population in abject poverty. 

omg u literally sound like an idiot!

We here at the Puggling team have noticed that there is an assault on grammar.  Now, normally, we don't have a great love of Big Grammar, but sometimes people go too far.  In recent years, there as been a steady movement to use the word "literally" in a vastly wrong context and definition.  If you don't know what we're talking about, you might be part of the problem.  Some examples:

1. I literally just died!  No, you didn't.
2. He literally punched his face in!  Possible, but highly unlikely unless the "he" you are talking about is in a full blown roid rage.
3. I'm about to literally dive into a bag of Oreos.  Now that's just unnecessary. 
   
4. My head literally exploded!  I hate you.

 What is happening here is people are using "literally" when they mean to use "I'm an idiot" "figuratively."  Nobody likes an over-exaggerator.  Now, there are some simple ways to remember when it is acceptable to use "literally."  First, did it actually happen?  If you actually died and are currently speaking with St. Peter, Elvis, or Ghandi, then go ahead, literally is your choice.  If not, you can simply say "I just about died," but fair warning you will sound like Blanche from the Golden Girls.  Second, are you using "literally" for emphasis?  If so, don't.  Third, in the sentence can you replace "literally" with "figuratively"?  Ok, so this one wasn't a way to remember how to use "literally," it was a request.  Fourth, if these guidelines are too much for you, avoid social situations and thus remove the temptation to literally make an error.  (See, it's not so hard!)

Don't Eat That Marshmallow!

The other day we here at Puggling watched a very interesting talk on little kids and marshmallows.  Psychologists place a four year old child in a room with a marshmallow and tell them that if they wait 15 minutes without eating the marshmallow, they will get another one.  Somehow, we don't think we'd last that long alone in a room with a marshmallow.

Obama's Muslim Outreach: A Step in the Right Direction

Today, President Obama begins his tour of the Middle East in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia.  This tour is in part designed to improve America's image in the region, which as the release of a new audio tape by Osama bin Laden shows is still needed.  However, the mere fact that the President is making the effort to have a dialog with the Muslim world goes a long way towards improving relations with the U.S.  On Thursday, Mr Obama is expected to deliver an address in Cairo, one that he promised to make during his campaign last year.  

But that is not to say that there isn't a large gap to overcome.  One of the primary issues facing Mr Obama is the issue of Israeli settlements which are one of the sticking points in the Isreali-Palestinean peace process.  The Arab community wants a statement from the U.S. on these settlements which can potentially drive a wedge between the U.S. and Israel, a long time ally.  Walking this balance will be a difficult path, but opening this dialog is the first step down the right direction.

China To Take on Hummer; Gets Ride Pimped

In breaking news today, ailing automaker General Motors has sold its Hummer brand to Chinese industrial company, Sichuan Tengzhong Heavy Industrial Machinery Company Ltd.  When asked for comment, GM CEO Fritz Henderson responded, "I am shocked.  We actually found people who hadn't heard what a worthless investment this was.  We had thought we were the last suckers in the world to buy Hummer, but no, these rubes from China thought that these monstrosities would make excellent soccer mom cars!"

Mr. Henderson continued, "We even made them take Xzibit!  We told them that he came free with purchase!"  After this exchange Mr Henderson broke out into a fit of laughter and could not continue the interview.  The Hummer brand has been credited with dragging down the GM portfolio with its lane clogging size and horrible fuel economy.  According to industry analysts, the gargantuan Hummer got 5.7 miles per gallon downhill.  In addition to the dismal mileage, the effect when a five foot two woman with road rage barrels down a highway left a bad taste in the mouths of consumers.

Bob Schultz, automobile expert from Des Plaines, Illinois, summed it up best.  "I guess the Chinese haven't seen the Canyonero episode of the Simpsons."

Searching for Meaning in GM

No, this has nothing to do with any deep thoughts on what the will happen to the country after GM filed for bankruptcy this morning.  We here at Puggling are looking for a good acronym for GM.  Mostly we have heard "Government Motors," but quite frankly, that is nowhere near as good as the acronyms for other car companies.  We are looking for something along the lines of a Fix It Again, Tony, or a Fixed Or Repaired Daily.

It could be that a good zinger at GM is just not possible.  The small amount of letters really limits those trying to mock GM's epic fail.  Not since the failure of Studebaker has the difficulty in coming up with a witty retort been as high.  There has to exist two perfect words to describe the situation with a humorous slant.  We really need our nation's top minds working on this immediately so the healing process can begin.

The Fall of Western Civilization: Baconnaise™

Well, it's finally here.  What everyone has been waiting for:  Baconnaise™.  For years, obese Americans have been craving a way to combine two of their biggest loves, bacon and mayonnaise.  We have just one question.  Why did this take so long for someone to invent this wonderful product?  Some may claim that it's a heart attack in a bottle, but just wait!  In a one tablespoon serving, Baconnaise™ only has 80 calories!  With such a small amount, we recommend even putting Baconnaise™ on bacon to make a double bacon power punch snack.

What, might you ask, do I do at restaurants that don't feature Baconnaise™?  Quite frankly, they are not worth eating at.  And if you must go there, remember, Baconnaise™ comes in a very portable 15 ounce jar!  When you arrive at the restaurant on your scooter, wearing your three wolf moon t-shirt, instantly Fauntleroy the Maitre'd will know you are a connoisseur of fine food and high society.  This is the food accessory that everyone must have*.

*Side effects of Baconnaise™** include dry mouth, constipation, uncontrollable drooling, spontaneous Foreign Accent Syndrome, whiplash, and loss of appetite.
**Please consult a doctor before starting a regimen of Baconnaise™ and notify your ER staff when starting Baconnaise™.

Rice and Ray-Bans: North Korea Redux

 On May 25th, North Korea tested a nuclear bomb which was estimated to be the same destructive force as the bomb dropped on Hiroshima in World War II.  In addition to the nuclear test, North Korea tested short range missiles which can potentially be used to deliver a nuclear attack on South Korea or Japan and involve the U.S. in the battle.  The world must react with speed and solidarity in order to keep North Korea from embroiling the region, and even world, in conflict.

According to a report in The Economist, this nuclear test may be the result of internal changes in the influence of hardliners from the armed forces.  One of these hardliners, Kim Yong-chol, is advocating the end of cooperation and contact with South Korea and further isolating the North.  This increase of hardliner influence is coming with the blessing of Kim Jong-Il who may have suffered a stroke last year.  Due to the extreme difficulty in determining the internal politics of North Korea, much is speculation.

While on an international level, North Korea’s actions appear to be irrational, on a state or domestic level, this saber rattling has a very rational goal.  These tests are an attempt to increase the internal control of the communist regime in North Korea.  According to Wendy R. Sherman, who coordinated North Korea policy during the Clinton administration, “they care about external matters only insofar as it helps ensure the survival of the regime.”  These tests are likely designed to appeal to the nationalist sentiment of the North Korean people and the media there is heaping of praise on the tests and the government.  Maintaining their power is a huge motivator for the ruling class in North Korea.  They are keeping their country in effectively the 17th century while living a life of luxury.

Their struggle to maintain power causes actions that baffle the rest of the world community.  It provokes responses from the outside world that damage the economy and well being of the country as a whole.  In the game of international relations, it can be counted on to make the play that will ensure the survival of the regime, not what is best for the country as a whole.  Its population is living in abject poverty and incentives do not appear to have had any affect on how North Korea conducts its international business.

Since maintaining power is the motivator for North Korea, taking actions that will prolong, or threaten, the regime may be the only way to get compliance from North Korea.  According to a New York Times article, “North Korea is not likely to be receptive to incentives. And it may have concluded that having nuclear weapons is a necessity for its own preservation.”  Possessing nuclear weapons is the regime’s trump card in fending off potential threats to the regime.  Further economic sanctions may be the only peaceful step toward getting North Korea to comply and give up its weapons.  However, because of the importance they have placed on weapons, it is highly unlikely that they will give these up without a fight.  Yet, that does not mean that war cannot be avoided.

The key in the world response may lie in China.  Of the limited international trade with North Korea, much of it is with China or flows through China.  China is the closest thing to an ally that North Korea has.  The U.S. can use its relationship with China to garner support in these sanctions.  In the past, North Korea has ignored U.N. resolutions and the sanctions have not been strictly enforced, but with China’s cooperation, these can be effective.  Creating internal pressure via sanctions is the most effective, and safest, route to get the North Koreans to change.

Creating an economic situation where maintaining the regime in its current form is untenable is the only hope for North Korea to have a permanent change – similar to the situation in the Soviet Union.  By quickly implementing strong and solid sanctions and preventing the North Korean regime from acquiring more nuclear weapons material, North Korea could step down its threatening actions.  Eventually, with a build up in internal pressures, the North Korean regime can begin to change and open the society in a process that will take many years.

Cuteness Attack!

Have you thought about what it would be like if a cartoon mouse popped up in real life?  Did you wonder will it walk on two feet?  Will it have an oversized head?  Will it have a British accent?  Well, if so you can see that it will!  (Well, everything but the British accent.)

The End of Innocence... Plus 8

In a shocking revelation, Jon and Kate Plus Eight is staged!  We here at Puggling are seeing the walls of our reality crumbling down.  Food no longer tastes as good, life seems dreary.  We were there when the twins first spotted Elvis hanging out with Bigfoot.  We reveled when little Aiden ski jumped over that shark.  When Jon and Kate got arrested for not helping out a person in need, we were there supporting them.  To now find out that none of that was real, we are just devastated.

Why does actual reality have to be boring?  We believe that a T.V. show about how a family of ten lives would be great!  It would be an hour of watching the family do things that a family of ten does.  Here is a breakdown:

1. Parents trying to remember each child's name: 5 minutes.
2. Parents color coding each child's outfit to help them remember those names: 10 minutes.
   
3. Children not following the system of color coding: 7 minutes.
4. Parents freaking out because each child now is wearing an outfit of eight colors: 15 minutes.
   
5. Parents gently rocking back and forth in a padded cell: 23 minutes.

We feel this would be very accurate to reality!  Great television doesn't have to be scripted!  Please Jon and Kate Plus 8, go back to the reality we so crave.  Kick the crap out of those damn Duggars!
 

The Reign in Spain to Stay Mainly in Spain?

There is a push in Spain to limit the ability of its courts.  Currently, Spain has a law which allows its courts to investigate and prosecute human rights violations regardless of where the events took place or where the perpetrators reside.  This law has been used to prosecute former Chilean dictator Augusto Pinochet (all around not a nice guy: see Operation Condor) and is currently being used to investigate the Bush administration's actions at Guantánamo Bay and Israeli actions during the recent war in Gaza. 

This law, however, is giving the Spanish government headaches though.  It is causing them to worry about relations with the U.S. as it is trying to forge a relationship with the Obama administration.  While this can cause tensions with the U.S., especially with issues of state sovereignty, ultimately the overall relationship with the U.S. is unlikely to change.  The U.S. (read Bush administration) might get a black eye, but any punishment will be avoided (as long as anyone convicted never goes to Spain).

Yet, Spain should not change this law.  Real outcomes happen when they begin investigations.  In the Pinchet case, Spain's actions caused Pinochet to be under house arrest in Britain and it also pushed Chile to start its own investigation.  Spain's moral position is influencing other nations to examine human rights abuses and while this may rub some states the wrong way, it does put Spain in a moral high ground.  Overall, these investigations and prosecutions benefit not only Spain, but also the rest of the world.

Amazon Product Reviews: Who knew they were so funny?

If you think that product reviews are boring, useless and un-funny, think again.  Those who have written these priceless pieces on the Three Wolf Moon Shirt, deserve to have their work published and distributed all over the world.  Here is one such post in its entirety.  We assure you that you will not be disappointed.

This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that's when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to 'howl at the moon' from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn't have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.

I arrived at Wal-mart, mounted my courtesy-scooter (walking is such a drag!) sitting side saddle so that my wolves would show. While I was browsing tube socks, I could hear aroused asthmatic breathing behind me. I turned around to see a slightly sweaty dream in sweatpants and flip-flops standing there. She told me she liked the wolves on my shirt, I told her I wanted to howl at her moon. She offered me a swig from her mountain dew, and I drove my scooter, with her shuffling along side out the door and into the rest of our lives. Thank you wolf shirt.

Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the 'guns'), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.

 This is just a taste of the vast amount of excellent prose that is on this page.  We implore you to explore more over at Amazon.com.

Link Time!

Some more links for your enjoyment! Check them out.  Or not.  Be bold in your decision.

1. A list of the biggest explosions ever!
2. Want to see the Milky Way Galaxy?  Here is a time lapse video.
3. What does your credit card company know about you?
4. The Secret Advantage of Being Short.
5. Cameos from the Batman TV series.
   

Nancy Pelosi and CIA Briefings, the Non-Issue Issue

What is the issue with if or when Nancy Pelosi knew about CIA torture methods?  As far as the big picture, in the words of The Rock, it doesn't matter.  She wouldn't have been the only one who would have been briefed.  Both Republicans and Democrats would be affected since Ms. Pelosi wasn't the only person in Congress that day. 

But let us assume that the CIA gave Nancy Pelosi a full briefing in 2002 on exactly what the program entailed.  Should she be accountable for what happened?  Some punishment should probably befall her if she knew torture was going on.  But wait, this concedes the point that waterboarding and the CIA interrogations were torture.  Then Nancy Pelosi wouldn't be the only person in trouble.  This would be massive.  From the people actually conducting the interrogations/torture, to their superiors who ordered it to the lawyers who condoned it.  Everything and everyone who were connected to these interrogations.  Former V.P. Dick Cheney has even implicated that President Bush knew about everything that was going on and signed off on this program. 

So, really, is proclaiming that Nancy Pelosi knew about the torture a good strategy?  No.  It's like saying "yeah, I punched an old woman in the face, but Nancy Pelosi knew about it!"  It doesn't change the fact that you punched an old woman in the face. 

Delightfully Awkward

We here at Puggling have discovered perhaps the most delightfully awkward website ever.  It is called Awkwardfamilyphotos.com. People post horrendous family pics and everyone gets to enjoy them.  Our personal favorite is the one where one guy just doesn't fit in with the rest of his family.  You'll know it when you see it.

A Democratic End in Pakistan and Afghanistan?

We here at Puggling have been reading Fareed Zakaria's The Future of Freedom, and have been pondering Afghanistand and Pakistan at the same time and how these two are related.  Zakaria maintains in one section of the book that there is a strong correlation between per capita GDP and democratic institutions surviving.  There is a threshold of about $1,500 a year in order for democracy to have a chance and once the per capita GDP reaches $6,000 democracy becomes "immortal."  Naturally, these aren't the only things necessary for democracy.  Events happening in the country play a huge role as well, but without the economic means, democracy is at a huge disadvantage.

In Afghanistan the per capita GDP is $800 which is only half of what is necessary while Pakistan's is approximately $2,600.  This suggests that along with a counter-insurgency strategy in Afghanistan, the U.S. must focus on the economic development.  The security of the population is still extremely important and the change to focus more on an insurgency by appointing a new general in Afghanistan demonstrates this.  But what do you do before you get to the economic tipping point?  Democracy is not a viable option at this point (and the current government of Afghanistan could hardly qualify as a democracy).  Using authoritarian means to establish institutions and the rule of law is the right track.  Democracy relies on these to keep order and starting out a fledgeling democracy without these is asking for failure.  Once these have been established, along with the economic pillar, Afghanistan has a chance. 

Pakistan is a prime example of how the economic part of the equation is not enough.  While they have the economic potential, their institutions are lacking.  The only real institution in Pakistan is the military which does not help with rule of law or other governmental expectations and the Taliban insurgency is a symptom of this.  The frustration with the Pakistani government is allowing the Taliban to thrive.  Encouraging institutional development (along with stopping the Taliban) is the long term path forward in Pakistan.

Global Warming in Maldives, Time for Panic!

The small island nation of Maldives thinks it is screwed.  Its president has proposed that all 300,000 citizens just pack up and move.  He has proposed that they move to India or Australia.  It is a long archepelago of islands with an average height of four feet above sea level.  Basically, a strong wave can wipe out the nation.  They take global warming very seriously and are keeping a keen eye on the sea level.  So think about that the next time you drive down the street with the windows down and the AC on high.

Al Qaeda: Tenacious Bastards Aren't They?

In a report from the New York Times, the strife in Pakistan is helping Al Qaeda in its recruitment.  The conflict in Pakistan has raised the hopes that there will be a "jihadist takeover of the region," which attracts more recruits.  This recruitment effort is replacing the numbers lost due to the airstrikes in the area which so far this year number 16 in comparison to 36 total in 2008.

While U.S. intelligence sources suggest that a Taliban takeover of Pakistan is unlikely due to the strength of the Pakistani army, Al Qaeda is smelling blood in the water.  Al Qaeda has changed its tactics to a more localized focus.  They are being run by small, well-organized groups which are working to destabilize Pakistan and create a feeling of insecurity.  The fighting is in the Buner and Swat regions of Pakistan, which are close to the capitol of Islamabad.

The destabilizing effect of open conflict in the region is still a serious concern.  An unstable Pakistan is a scary thought.  They have a large army and nuclear weapons.  Their borders are porous and a haven for Al Qaeda and the Taliban.  Pakistan must be a top priority.  Pakistan is already bordering on being a failed state and a prolonged conflict near the capitol would push it over the edge.

Links: Randomness via Hypertext

Here are some links that we here at Puggling have decided are fun, interesting or just plain weird.  No, there aren't any LOLCats and you can keep your dirty paws of my cheeseburger.  However, we do not guarantee that you won't get RickRoll'd. 

• Dinosaurs: extinct from either a meteor or the inability to reach their face with those tiny little arms is still extinct.  But here is a little article about how it might have happened.
• Did you ever wonder what happened to the idea of lots of celebrities getting together to sing for a cause?  Well, apparently, it was a symptom of the 80s. 
• Do you want to call BS on a political figure but don't feel like doing the legwork?  Check out Politifact!
• If this doesn't keep people from using an auto-tuner, nothing will.

Torture Reform

According to a recent Associated Press report, the Justice Department investigation into the lawyers who sanctioned so-called "enhanced interrogation" techniques is only recommending disciplinary action by their local Bar Associations.  Not only did John Yoo and Jay Bybee create memos allowing for torture to occur, but they apparently have never seen Judgment at Nuremberg.  According to the Third Geneva Convention, "no physical or mental torture, nor any other form of coercion" can happen to any prisioner. 

Arguments have been focused on the first part of this clause stating "no physical or mental torture," but the second bans any other form of coercion.  People are arguing about if it was torture.  The real test is whether or not it is coercion which would have a lesser threshold.  Waterboarding certainly fits the criteria for coercion; "the use of force or intimidation to obtain compliance."  These lawyers who wrote the memos outlining how these techniques should at least face disbarment and if Attorney General Eric Holder decides, criminal charges.  Authorizing torture is a crime and just "following orders" is not an excuse.

Video on the Iraq Insurgency

This is a pretty interesting look at the Iraq War and what has happened.  We recommend taking a quick look at this.

Check out more TED Talks on a huge range of topics!

Crap, Arnold Has to Be Behind This

Is this the first step towards a self aware computer system?  Curious that there is a new Terminator movie coming out soon.  Coincidence?  We think not. There are a multitude of goals for this system:

1. Use technology to deter or defeat enemies.
2. Secure our cybernetic systems.
   
3. Improve the Pentagon's cyber training capability.
4. Kill John Connor.

We are just waiting for Ah-nold to comment on this story and calm our fears...

Swine Flu: One Hit Wonder

Well, two weeks into the swine flu bonanza, only 1000 confirmed cases have been discovered and in Mexico, the threat level is being lowered and things are opening back up.  After a great start out of the gate, this one faded in the finish.  While some people might compare the swine flu to Vanilla Ice, we here at Puggling do not share this view.  Swine Flu is more like Europe's "Final Countdown."  Vanilla Ice is still culturally relevant and has been remembered for nearly two decades.  While "Final Countdown" has only been put back into public view by being a cheesy background for GOB in Arrested Development.  "Ice Ice Baby" is still played at wedding receptions and we (conservatively) estimate that 34% of Americans can rap along side the song.  It can still get a party going.  It places easily in the top five:

1. Bon Jovi: Livin' On a Prayer
2. Vanilla Ice: Ice Ice Baby
   
3. Sir Mix-A-Lot: Baby Got Back
4. Journey:  Don't Stop Believing
   
5. AC/DC: You Shook Me All Night Long

Swine Flu is a cheeseball 80's hair band song.

Thoughts on Iran and Falafel

Recently, we here at Puggling were wondering: just what all is involved with an improved relationship with Iran?  First, our thoughts went to better falafel in the U.S.  But other than that, what is to be gained?  Well, Iran is smack dab in the middle of both Iraq and Afghanistan.  Perfectly situated to help the stability of both countries. 

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For Iraq, the militias which have been causing trouble are funded and supplied by Iran.  According to The Economist, after the Iraqi army with help from British forces "many of the militia leaders fled to Iran, which had been supplying them with weapons, especially Katyusha rockets."  Iran and Iraq do not like each other.  Period.  They fought a nasty war in the 80's and they differ religiously as well.  Iran is not necessarily helping the militias to thwart U.S. interests, but that is a nice bonus.  If Iran withdraws its support of these militias, stability after the U.S. leaves is a greater probability.  In Basra alone:

According to a Western police adviser, some 900 of the murders that took place in 2006, in a city of 1.7m people, remain unsolved to this day. The murder rate that year was some 40 times higher than Britain’s. In 2007 the figure was probably worse. Some say half of Basra’s 20,000-strong police force had been infiltrated by the militias. Many kidnappings and murders were committed by people in police uniforms. A sheikh of the al-Abadi tribe says the militias killed about 10,000 Basrawis during their two years’ reign.  (The Economist)

 These militias are big perpetrators of the crimes that are causing instability and Iran can sweep their legs out from under them.

With respect to Afghanistan, Iran can help provide access to the regions where there are limited roads.  It is an issue when aid and supplies cannot get to their destinations.  Also, Iran undoubtably has some experience in dealing with the Taliban and the tribal regions which border it.  The fractured and tribal nature of Afghanistan hinders development and the creation of a national government.  Our hopes though remain on falafel...

The World is Coming to an End!

The World Health Organization has raised the Pandemic Level for the Swine Flu Bonanza to FIVE!  Mexico is basically shut down.  North Korea keeps rattling it's saber.  Pakistan is circling the drain.  The U.S. GDP shrank 6.1% in the first quarter.  But what we really can't belive is that Sean Penn and Robin Wright (Penn) are filing for divorce!  What the hell?!?!

Arlen Specter Face Math. More Complicated Than You'd Think

So, the big news yesterday out of Washington, D.C. was that Senator Arlen Specter has switched parties from the Republicans to the Democrats.  Some people are calling him two faced.  But does this really add up?  Specter has always been a fairly moderate senator; he was one of three Republicans to vote for the stimulus bill.  So how do you quantify his face?  Well, I think we can all agree that everyone starts out with one.

Is face really constant?  People lose and gain face all the time.  Their actions change how much face they have.  But this really doesn't help us when you want to analyze Specter's face.  We wanted to know just how "Republican" Specter was.  So we went to GovTrack and decided to look how he compared to your "average" Republican senator.  (We chose senator, not general congressman since one: the senate tends to contain more stable individuals and you don't have nutcases and two: they don't vote on the same things.)  However, there are 40 other Republican senators with 172 votes each from 2009 to add up.  We instead decided to pick John Cornyn of Texas because he seemed really indignant over the Specter switch, he's in what looks to be the center of the Republicans in this chart, and finally he's in charge of winning seats for Republicans in 2010.

When we looked at the votes, Specter differed from Cornyn on 73 of 172 votes in 2009.  So in essence Specter had 57.5% of a Republican face.  When he switched parties, he lost 0.575 face.

But wait!  He gained face with respect to Democrats!  He only lost Republican face.  His 2009 voting record shows he's not with John "Average" Cornyn 42.5% of the time.  So he gained 0.452 Democrat face.  So the new calculation of his face is:

How do we tell what is a Republican Face and what is a Democrat Face?  Well, that sounds much more complicated.  What parts of his face are Democrat and what parts are Republican?  If we were the Democrats, we'd call the best parts, but being not the most attractive man, this is a difficult call.  Each party's face must be some function of the total face so Arlen Specter's face function looks closer to this:

At this point Arlen Specter's face is a differential equation!  Arlen is a very complex man.  Geez, at this point, can't we all agree that Arlen just switched parties because he in the middle and his party is really just a toss up anyway and he's more electable in Pennsylvania as a Democrat?

Cuba: Where GM Automobiles are Still the Only Game in Town

While many things are going on in the world today, from Pakistan circling the drain to Swine Flu, the Obama administration is preparing for informal talks with the Cuban government according to an article in the New York Times.  While Cuba has a history of stopping the conversation before substantive talks, preparations for talks is a sensible thing to do.  Both of the Castro brothers are getting elderly and they will not be around forever.  A thaw in the relations between the countries would be beneficial to all.  A new market would be available for American goods and for Cuba, a new promise of economic prosperity.

While many Cuban Americans oppose improved relations with the two countries, the trade embargo, in place for 47 years, has not worked.  Castro & Co. are still in business and until they die, show no signs of letting go.  As with the Soviet Union, if there is an easing in economic restrictions & social freedoms (See: Perestroika & Glasnost) there will be severe issues with maintaining control over the population.  Which is probably why Castro (Raul and Fidel) have resisted change.

This is an application of what has been dubbed the Obama Doctrine which invovles listening and opening dialogs with other nations in an effort to use "smart power" which is both diplomatic efforts combined with military pressure.  In other words - speak primarily, but remember you still have a stick. 

Swine Flu: Take That Monkey Pox!

In funny illness news, Swine Flu is sweeping across North America.  It's all the rage these days in Mexico and the trend is catching on in the U.S. and Canada.  The marketing machine is already targeting overseas consumers and we've not seen such potential for a global fad since SARS was in style.  You might be asking "how can I get my very own Swine Flu?"  All you have to do is get one of these little guys on the right!  This small critter is as deadly as you can find.  His cute exterior is great packaging for Swine Flu.  The folks at Madison Avenue have done it again.

In an economy hit by a major recession, Big Epidemic has come through again.  Since their last product, Avian Flu, was generally thought of as a bust, this was a must win situation for them.  So far the first reviews have been great and this one really has the potential to go the distance.  This new product is also accessorized.  Giving this one a grade, we say A+!

A Taliban in Pakistan (well, more than one really...)

So, the Taliban is back in vogue in the 'Stan region of the world.  Recently, Pakistan has slowly been succumbing to the Taliban.  They have set up Islamic law in the Swat region of Pakistan and taken over an area only 60 miles from the capitol, Islamabad.  There is a real chance that Pakistan will become a failed state (and some could make the argument that it already is).  In a recent New York Times article, General David Petraeus states that these extremists who have set camp in the border region between Afghanistan and Pakistan are threatening "Pakistan's very existence."

As the Taliban is slowly moving over the country, it is taking advantage of anti-American sentiment and, like it did in Afghanistan, is promising justice and order in the country.  If the Taliban does take control of Pakistan, this will be a very serious issue.  Quite simply, Pakistan has nukes.  Not a lot, but one is enough.  If an extreme group such as the Taliban has control over these weapons, all hell could break loose.  Shipping a nuke overseas and striking another country would cause great destruction and fear and probably start a nuclear war.  The potential targets are many, but the top three, in my best estimation, would be: 1.  The United States, since it was the main aggressor in Afghanistan, forcing them out.  2.  The United Kingdom, a major ally of the U.S. during the Afghanistan war.  3.  India, Kashmir has been a source of tension ever since Great Britain split the countries up in the 40s.

While a nuclear attack on all three countries is devastating, the nuclear fallout will affect not only the human population of the affected region, but food production would be affected in India and maybe even China.  A food shortage in the world's two most populous countries (both of which are nuclear capable and emerging economic giants) will cause chaos which could pull the entire world into conflict.  The bottom line is, Pakistan cannot fail.  The ramifications are too dire.

Signs of the Collapse of Western Civilization

We here at Puggling were perusing The Internets recently and found some very disturbing things.  The downfall of civilization as we know it is coming soon and these are some of the reasons why:

1. People actually care about Spencer and Heidi.  At least enough for MTV to film it.  We don't even know why we are mentioning it.  Oh yeah.  The apocalypse.
2. Glenn Beck.  The dude is crazy.  Like Jack Nicholson in The Shining crazy.  'Nuff said.
3. The Snuggie.  How are these selling? Seriously.  It's a freaking blanket with holes in it.  There is no way someone should ever pay for this.  Nobody ever thought "gee, I love my blanket, but I wish I could wear it like a muumuu."
4. Isiah Thomas got hired to run something basketball related.  He has managed to kill one basketball league, squander the Indiana Pacers best years in decades, made the New York Knicks waste lots of money, and lose a sexual harassment lawsuit.  Good going FIU.
5. Pirates are the number one threat to America.  They have just been laying low for the past 200 years.  The next threat no one will ever expect...
   

So Let Me Get This Straight....

In a recent interview with Sean "The Manatee" Hannity, Dick Cheney attempted to legitimize the use of torture.  He claimed that there are memos out there showing that we gained valuable intelligence from these techniques.  Undoubtably there are memos out there with some scrap of intelligence that was gained.  However, there are other techniques which can be used without torture.  There is an implication that coercive methods helped stop a radiological plot involving Jose Padilla (the American implicated in Al Qaeda activities), but the real danger of an actual "dirty bomb" is minimal due to the short half life of most of the possible contaminants. 

Also, the use of torture at Abu Gharaib has been used as a recruitment tool for terrorists and removed America from the moral high ground which has been a central component of U.S. foreign policy since Woodrow Wilson.  The United States has seen itself as that "City on the Hill," a shining example of how to behave on the world stage.  We view the world through a moral lens, which has often been used to justify involvement in conflicts around the globe.  The United States prosecuted torture as war crimes after World War II.  We agreed to the Geneva Conventions which ban the use of torture.  The issue is not whether or not torture works, but really can the United States participate in this and remain a world leader.  And the answer is no.

And Iran, Iran so far away.... (it's been done before, so sue me)

Iran has announced that it officially is welcoming talks over its nuclear program.  Likely, Iran is looking for gains in exchange for changes in - or even outright abandonment of - their nuclear program.  While complete abandonment of their nuclear program is highly unlikely, suspension of the program, perhaps for increased trade, or maybe normalized relations with the U.S., is probably the goal of U.S. diplomats.  The talks will be among the five United Nations Security Council members, Germany and Iran.

Suspension of the program will face much opposition from both internal and external factors.  Inside Iran, the hardliners would still push for continuation of the program for both the energy and potential weapons gains.  Outside of Iran, Russia has been supplying them with the nuclear material which they are attempting to enrich.  This is a nice revenue source for Russia and Russia is a valuable trading partner with Iran so they do not wish to stop a profitable relationship. 

If the main issue that the U.S. has is the enriching of uranium, then there is a practical solution.  There are heavy water nuclear reactors which do not require enriched uranium as a fuel.  These reactors do not produce as much plutonium (the material used in nuclear weapons) as other reactors.  Many countries have used this type of reactor including Canada, China and India.  However, if the impasse is the very fact that it is a nuclear program, the talks will likely be just that, talks. 

Okay, okay, the real reason for the post:

Earth Day 2009: Go Green, Dammit!

Today is Earth Day.  The one day a year when people are supposed to think about the Earth and human's impact on it.  However, people are more concerned about their wallets.  In good times, people can afford to "go green," but people today don't feel that they can.  There are small steps that people can take: first, use re-usable bags in place of plastic or paper bags.  Each plastic bag takes decades to biodegrade in a landfill (as they are not easily recycled) and paper bags mean more trees gone.  Reusable bags are not expensive either.  This bag at Target is 99 cents and can be used over and over.  Also, compact flourescent lights are a great way to reduce energy consumption by approximately 77% (a 100 watt light equivalent only uses 23 watts).  While these are more expensive (about $4.17 per bulb as opposed to $0.51 per bulb), they do last about 10 times longer and the newer bulbs no longer have the flourescent light glare.

But, the best way to reduce energy usage is to not use the energy in the first place.  When you leave a room - even for only a minute - turn off the lights.  That is a 100% energy savings.  Also, a lot of people keep their computers in "sleep mode" overnight.  Shut it down.  Sleep mode doesn't mean off.  Energy in the United States is cheap.  The national average cost of electricity in the U.S. is 9.64 cents per kilowatt hour (Source: Dept. of Energy).  In Europe, the cheapest electricity is still more than the U.S. average (11.44 cents) and the most expensive is over four times more expensive at 41.34 cents.  To keep our electricity cheap, we need to do what we can to use less of it.  Or else face a wasteland as prophesized by Walter E.

The Palin Issue: Round 2

Sarah Palin is a polarizing person. Many Americans know this. However, she appears not to. She has recently set up a political action committee, SarahPAC, in an apparent move towards presidential candidacy in 2012. In a USA Today/Gallup poll right after the election (the latest data we could find), Sarah Palin had an 83% favorable rating from Republicans, while nearly the same unfavorable from Democrats. While this may not be surprising to many, it is the number of independents which make up the real difference. Independents held her unfavorable by a margin of 48% to 44%, outside the margin of error.

Some could argue that her conduct since has not helped her image. The Thanksgiving interview (where she was filmed with turkeys being beheaded behind her), the Levi Johnston debacle (see Banks, Tyra) and her recent rambling appearance at an Evansville, Indiana right to life group have all hurt her. While many Americans can reinvent themselves (Joe Biden got in big trouble for plagiarizing a stump speech of a member of parliament a couple decades ago), four years is probably not enough time for Palin. Her negatives were her lack of experience, lack of command of facts and her right wing stances. And don't forget the Katie Couric interview, perhaps one of the most damaging interviews in political history. It will not disappear any time soon. All of these alienate the middle, which is where elections are won and lost. She will appear formidable in the Republican primary where appealing to the extremes of the party gain you votes (see this article over at Politico.com). Look for Palin to do well out of the gates in the 2012 contest, but fade quickly in the finish where the middle matters.

Calling Crockett and Tubbs...

According to a recent New York Times article, Baghdad is once again safe enough for people to start doing what people are inclined to do: vice. This is a significant step towards normality. People are feeling safe enough to stay out later at night and go cavorting in parks and bars. In the past, Baghdad was full of cafes and nightlife, much like a classic scene from movie, even during the Saddam Hussein era. This freedom is significant because people had been staying inside due to militias, kidnappings and explosions. Six years in, life is returning to normal: 1980's Miami, however, according to the article, without the drugs... or the cars... or Don Johnson.

Now what? Ninjas?

With all the recent pirate attacks on American ships and even mortar shells being targeted at a congressman's plane, people are up in arms over the issue of piracy. The crew of the Maersk Alabama are asking for the U.S. to do more to combat piracy. According to an article written on MSN.com, pirates collected approximately 18 to 30 million dollars in 2008. Also, pirate attacks are up 11% in 2008, according to the International Maritime Bureau's Piracy Reporting Centre, and we would be willing to bet that much of the increase is due to the worsening global economic situation much in the same way that crime rates increase during poor economic times. This would imply that an overall improvement in the global economy would help to quell some of these pirate attacks. This also would indicate that economic aid in would have a greater effect on the pirate problem than sending patrol boats out.

Since the pirates operate in an estimated 1.4 million square miles off the coast of Somalia, these patrol boats have a vast area to cover. According to the same MSN ariticle, there are approximately 30 warships off of Somalia and that means that each ship must cover approximately 46,000 square miles. However, in March, there were 15 attacks on merchant ships and about 1400 ships passed through the area in that time making the the probability of an attack at 1.07%. While this number might seem low, a 1 in 100 risk of being attacked by pirates is not odds we here would like take.

Now, if these 30 ships were to go to the coast of somalia and patrol the waters near these ports (a delicate task because putting warships off the coast of a sovereign nation tends to be a touchy subject), it would dramatically reduce the amount of area required to cover. A quick look at Google Maps reveals 29 cities which may or may not have a port large enough for a supertanker or merchant ship. This would give about a 1:1 ratio of ships to ports and make the problems more containable.