Iran, Tired of N. Korea Being in the News, Goes Apeshit

With the controversial results of Iran's recent presidential elections, Iran has once again recaptured the headlines.  Protests have broken out after Mahmoud Ahmadinejad claimed to have won a landslide victory.  However, this is truly a blatant attempt to steal back the headlines after North Korea appears to be setting up its next dictator by giving him his own title roughly translated as, "Cuddly Aardvark." 

One protester was overheard saying, "they think they can push us off the front page of the New York Times?"  He then proceeded to throw spoiled cabbage at riot cops.  The outrage over the recent nuclear test and rocket launches boiled over this weekend.  "We are tired of being though to have 'potential'!" screamed one mad protester as she hurled a tomato at a smoldering pit where a Lexus used to stand.  After this fruity display of rage toward the international press community, she attempted to explain her position in further detail, but was pegged with a canister filled with what some are calling chemical weapons, but what we in the U.S. call Axe Body Spray.

In an attempt to calm down the restless populace, the supreme leader, Ayatollah Ali Khomenei ordered an investigation into the election results.  There is some speculation that a quick end to the conflict will relegate Iran's political maneuverings to page A6 or even A7.

However, at the core of the issue is the fact that the election appears to many to have been rigged.  When asked for comment, expert in being defeated in rigged elections, Al Gore, was unavailable, but over the phone we could hear quiet sobbing in the background.