Goodbye Nuclear Weapons, See You in Iran!

Yesterday, the United Nations Security Council, with President Obama as its chairman, voted to strengthen the restrictions on nuclear technology, making it more difficult to convert peaceful applications into weapons programs.  This, however, is still a matter of enforcement which has been a persistent problem for the United Nations in the past; its coffee and doughnut budget has been exceeded for every year of its existence.  Iran is at the heart of this matter, even though President Obama was very general in his comments during the meeting, but glared at Mahmoud Ahmadinejad because "he knows what he did." 

Imma Let You Finish Afghanistan, but Iran Had the Craziest Election of All Time

In what we can only imagine as a scene out of Michael Jackson's Bad, clashing rallies erupted in Iran.  Today, in Iran, is Quds Day which is a major day for the Iranian regime (not unlike ten cent wing day).  It is an occasion for people to show their support for the Palestinians and opposition to Israel.  This rally by the opposition is the first major one since July and there have been reports that former president Mohamad Khatami was attacked by the paramilitary group the Basij. 

No Missile Shield for You!

Today, the U.S. announced that it is scrapping the Bush era missile defense shield in Poland and the Czech Republic and replacing it with a different system to first be deployed aboard ships and potentially then in Southern Europe.  This move will likely appeal to Russia who had vehemently opposed the Bush plan and liked to do some sabre rattling about it.  There is no word on whether or not this move was accompanied by a large shipment of vodka and beets to St. Petersburg. 

Update: Iran Still Pissed About Election

Well, it looks like the rage of 1000 Suns in Iran over last month's election is still smoldering.  Top cleric Ali Akbar Hashemi Rafsanjani criticized the hard liners in the Iranian government and called for the release of those arrested in the aftermath of the election.  He also said that doubts over the election have been raised and those doubts need to be resolved in order for this issue to be settled.  Since the Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei decreed that the election was valid, raising the spectre of doubts over the election is tantamount to challenging him.

Iran Protests: What Do You Love About Your Police State?

While admitting (and then denying) election fraud has quickly become passé, crackdowns, beatdowns, and shutdowns are the new rage in Iran.  Today protests were stopped by masses of riot police and Ayatollah Ali Khamenei has stated that Iran will not yield to the pressures of the protests.  All this got us at Puggling wondering just what are the best things about living in a police state?

Iran Still Going Apeshit; Pakistan Jealous

In a not so shocking development, the Guardian Council of Iran has stated that no voting irregularities occurred before the election not during or after.  They have also stated that there was not enough evidence of voter fraud to overturn the election results and Ahmadinejad will be re-sworn into office sometime between July 26th and August 19th.  All the while, leaders of the opposition and people with ties to candidate Mir Hossein Moussavi are steadily being arrested and detained. 

Iran Election: They Admitted It!?!?!

In a flash of stupidity, the Iranian Guardian Council stated that more people voted than were eligible in at least 50 regions.  However they claim that the discrepancy is not enough to affect the outcome of the election, but admitting that there were shenanigans in the election will likely not placate the protesters.  Too many votes were cast?  Apparently the voting in Iran is run by this guy →.  The Iranian regime could at least have stuck to its story.  There are middle school cheating rings with greater message discipline. 

Iranian Election: We Call Shenanigans

Just in case you haven't been paying attention, something smells funny in Iran and it's not just the thousands of people in the desert heat.  In the recent Iranian election, there was a reported 85% turnout and incumbent president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad won a surprising 62.6% of the vote.  While this might not be in itself a strange result, the fact that his victory was announced before some of the polls closed, and before many of the millions of paper ballots could possibly have been counted.

This week the Ayatollah went on national television to declare that the vote was not rigged.  Thousands of Iranians are still planning on protesting on Saturday despite the despotic decree that protesters be "held responsible" if these protests continue which sounds like code for "crackdown."  In something eerily out of the plot of V for Vendetta, Iran is blaming outside threats for the internal turmoil and is basically threatening violence on the populace if they don't stop expressing their dissent.  Hell, Iran has its own secretive shock troops called the Basij.

So, when the crowd shows up looking like this → the Iranian regime will need to run for the hills.  While the approach the protesters are taking is mirroring that of Ghandi, the power of peaceful protest is still great and it is doubtful that the Iranian country would react well to a crackdown on peaceful protesters.  The longer these protests continue, the greater the threat to the Ayatollah and the mistake of effectively giving the election to Ahmadinejad could be the turning point and potentially bring about change in the country.

Iranian Protests: Twitter Now Used for Something Other than Talking About Your Cat

The spotty reports coming out of Iran are showing what appears to be a massive protest against the recent elections.  Many of these reports are coming through on social networking sites like Twitter or Facebook.  The Iranian regime is attempting to block access to these sites with very limited success.  There have been thousands of posts on Twitter of video and photos of the protests as well as the violence that has accompanied some of these.  The normal usage of Twitter, blabbing about your stupid cat, is being overshadowed as the amount of these posts grows. 

Much of the organization of these protests is being run through Twitter and today a massive rally was organized in Iran's capital, Tehran, by the opposition leader, Mir Hussein Moussavi.  If these protests continue to gather strength, this will force the regime into a corner and the reaction will likely not be pretty.  The real power in Iran does not rest within the president or with the prime minister, but with the supreme leader, the Ayatollah.  Think of him as one of the crazy cat people on Twitter.  He's getting madder and madder that his tweets aren't being heard over the din of the protesters.  Once he is threatened enough, he is likely to use force to quell this movement. 

Once it gets to the point of force, the situation can become very destabilizing to the entire country.  This will become a power struggle and the entire country could very easily delve into a civil war.  However, if these protests slowly peter out, it is likely not much will change in Iran, and this is how the regime would like this all to end.

Iran, Tired of N. Korea Being in the News, Goes Apeshit

With the controversial results of Iran's recent presidential elections, Iran has once again recaptured the headlines.  Protests have broken out after Mahmoud Ahmadinejad claimed to have won a landslide victory.  However, this is truly a blatant attempt to steal back the headlines after North Korea appears to be setting up its next dictator by giving him his own title roughly translated as, "Cuddly Aardvark." 

One protester was overheard saying, "they think they can push us off the front page of the New York Times?"  He then proceeded to throw spoiled cabbage at riot cops.  The outrage over the recent nuclear test and rocket launches boiled over this weekend.  "We are tired of being though to have 'potential'!" screamed one mad protester as she hurled a tomato at a smoldering pit where a Lexus used to stand.  After this fruity display of rage toward the international press community, she attempted to explain her position in further detail, but was pegged with a canister filled with what some are calling chemical weapons, but what we in the U.S. call Axe Body Spray.

In an attempt to calm down the restless populace, the supreme leader, Ayatollah Ali Khomenei ordered an investigation into the election results.  There is some speculation that a quick end to the conflict will relegate Iran's political maneuverings to page A6 or even A7.

However, at the core of the issue is the fact that the election appears to many to have been rigged.  When asked for comment, expert in being defeated in rigged elections, Al Gore, was unavailable, but over the phone we could hear quiet sobbing in the background.

Thoughts on Iran and Falafel

Recently, we here at Puggling were wondering: just what all is involved with an improved relationship with Iran?  First, our thoughts went to better falafel in the U.S.  But other than that, what is to be gained?  Well, Iran is smack dab in the middle of both Iraq and Afghanistan.  Perfectly situated to help the stability of both countries. 

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For Iraq, the militias which have been causing trouble are funded and supplied by Iran.  According to The Economist, after the Iraqi army with help from British forces "many of the militia leaders fled to Iran, which had been supplying them with weapons, especially Katyusha rockets."  Iran and Iraq do not like each other.  Period.  They fought a nasty war in the 80's and they differ religiously as well.  Iran is not necessarily helping the militias to thwart U.S. interests, but that is a nice bonus.  If Iran withdraws its support of these militias, stability after the U.S. leaves is a greater probability.  In Basra alone:

According to a Western police adviser, some 900 of the murders that took place in 2006, in a city of 1.7m people, remain unsolved to this day. The murder rate that year was some 40 times higher than Britain’s. In 2007 the figure was probably worse. Some say half of Basra’s 20,000-strong police force had been infiltrated by the militias. Many kidnappings and murders were committed by people in police uniforms. A sheikh of the al-Abadi tribe says the militias killed about 10,000 Basrawis during their two years’ reign.  (The Economist)

 These militias are big perpetrators of the crimes that are causing instability and Iran can sweep their legs out from under them.

With respect to Afghanistan, Iran can help provide access to the regions where there are limited roads.  It is an issue when aid and supplies cannot get to their destinations.  Also, Iran undoubtably has some experience in dealing with the Taliban and the tribal regions which border it.  The fractured and tribal nature of Afghanistan hinders development and the creation of a national government.  Our hopes though remain on falafel...

And Iran, Iran so far away.... (it's been done before, so sue me)

Iran has announced that it officially is welcoming talks over its nuclear program.  Likely, Iran is looking for gains in exchange for changes in - or even outright abandonment of - their nuclear program.  While complete abandonment of their nuclear program is highly unlikely, suspension of the program, perhaps for increased trade, or maybe normalized relations with the U.S., is probably the goal of U.S. diplomats.  The talks will be among the five United Nations Security Council members, Germany and Iran.

Suspension of the program will face much opposition from both internal and external factors.  Inside Iran, the hardliners would still push for continuation of the program for both the energy and potential weapons gains.  Outside of Iran, Russia has been supplying them with the nuclear material which they are attempting to enrich.  This is a nice revenue source for Russia and Russia is a valuable trading partner with Iran so they do not wish to stop a profitable relationship. 

If the main issue that the U.S. has is the enriching of uranium, then there is a practical solution.  There are heavy water nuclear reactors which do not require enriched uranium as a fuel.  These reactors do not produce as much plutonium (the material used in nuclear weapons) as other reactors.  Many countries have used this type of reactor including Canada, China and India.  However, if the impasse is the very fact that it is a nuclear program, the talks will likely be just that, talks. 

Okay, okay, the real reason for the post: